Two women are standing together indoors, smiling at the camera. The woman on the left has gray curly hair, glasses, and is wearing a colorful dress. She is holding a pamphlet or magazine titled 'You Should Be Grateful.' The woman on the right has straight black hair with bangs, earrings, a dark green t-shirt with white text that says 'Adopted & Loving Society,' and white pants. In the background, there are tables with informational materials, and other people are engaged in activities. The setting appears to be a community event or fair.

HOME · BECOME A MENTOR

Ready to walk alongside
a fellow adoptee?

AMS mentors are adoptees who’ve done the work — and are ready to show up for others. If that’s you, we’d love to hear from you.

Apply to Become a Mentor →
Apply to Become a Mentor →
Watch the Info Session First →
Watch the Info Session First →

This is a big responsibility. We treat it that way.

Becoming an AMS mentor isn’t a casual commitment — and that’s by design. The adoptees who join our programs deserve mentors who are compassionate, skilled, and ready to show up with authenticity and care. We intentionally set a high bar because these relationships matter. Here’s what we ask of our mentors — and what you’ll receive in return.

WHAT IT TAKES

Become a Mentor — Cards
Who can apply

The basics we look for

  • You must be an adoptee
  • 25 years of age or older
  • Have attended at least three Adoptee Lounges prior to applying
What’s required

The commitment we ask for

  • 1 year commitment
  • 10–15 hours per month
  • Attendance at the Mentor Skills Lab & onboarding
  • Monthly Mentor Coaching Sessions
  • Quarterly check-ins with AMS staff
  • Comfort using online tools such as Slack, Zoom, and Monday.com
What you receive

The support we give back

  • $3,000 annual stipend
  • Joining a cohort of mentors
  • One free monthly Adoptee Lounge coupon
  • Monthly group consultations with a licensed clinician
  • Expert-led Mentor Skills Lab training

Four values every AMS mentor carries into every session.

MENTOR VALUES

Mentor Values — Grid
01

Radical Acceptance

We offer unconditional positive regard to every mentee — fostering an environment of respect and support where adoptees feel genuinely safe.

02

Inch-Wide, Mile-Deep

We prioritize meaningful, transformative work over surface-level connection. Depth matters more than volume.

03

Openness

We trust that the right conversations, people, and outcomes will emerge — staying present and open rather than directing or prescribing.

04

Boundaries

We honor time and closure, beginning and ending with intention — and accepting that non-closure can be a valid and important stopping point.

READY TO APPLY?

The first step is getting to know us — and letting us get to know you.

Before applying, we recommend watching our mentor info session to get a full picture of the role. When you’re ready, you can preview the application to see exactly what we’re looking for — then submit when the time feels right.

Preview the Application →
Watch the Mentor Info Session →